Castle Heist
by NMMacc18
Summary: After discovering they're low on coins, Wario and Waluigi decide to rob Peach's Castle. Needless to say, it doesn't go well...


Not that far from the borders of the Mushroom Kingdom, at the top of a fairly large hill, was Wario's Castle. Unlike Bowser's, it was a lot nicer looking, and was pretty polished for the most part.

But lets forget about talking about castles, lets get to the story shall we?

Wario was enjoying himself, having two cheeseburgers and a root beer for breakfast.

And yes, this is normal for him.

"Hey Wario! We got-a bit of a problem!" Waluigi said as he came into the kitchen.

"What-a now? More-a of those darn shroommarketers?" Wario asked as he finished chugging down his root beer.

"No-a! We're-a practically broke-a!" Waluigi grumbled.

"WHAT?! I thought-a we had-a plenty!" Wario said shocked.

"Come see-a for yourself-a!" Waluigi said as he led Wario down to their vault.

Wario was surprised to see his vault only with several hundred coins in it.

"Dang it! We gotta get some coins so we don't-a lose my castle!" Wario groaned.

"But what-a are we gonna do?" Waluigi asked.

"I don't know-a! Think of something!" Wario grumbled.

"What if we-a robbed the First Mushroom Bank?"

"We nearly got arrested last time-a we robbed there-a!"

"Then I got-a nothing." Waluigi said sighing.

Wario grumbled, and thought about a place the two did not rob often, or hadn't robbed before. Then, it came to him.

"I got it! We'll-a rob-a Peach's Castle! I know-a exactly where that vault is at, and its got lotsa coins in it!" Wario said grinning evilly.

"Hey, that's-a not-a bad idea!" Waluigi said in agreement.

The two laughed manically as they loaded a bunch of coin bags into Wario's car that he "borrowed" from the Mushroom Kingdom Kart Dealership, and they set off.

* * *

Soon, the two arrived at Peach's Castle.

"So how-a are we gonna get in?" Waluigi asked.

"Uh... I don't-a know! I've only been in it-a once or twice-a!" Wario said flustered, trying to think of a way to get in.

"Should-a we try the front doors and sneak down to the vault from there-a?"

"Eh, worth a shot-a." Wario said as the two grabbed their bags and went to the doors of the castle and tries opening the doors.

They were locked, so they knocked on the door numerous times.

Toad, who was doing pretty much nothing, sighed, "Guess I'll answer it..." he said as he went to open the door.

But upon opening, and seeing Wario and Waluigi, he screamed and slammed the door shut, and put the extra protective locks on the doors as well.

"Well-a there goes-a THAT..." Wario grumbled.

"Wait-a! Ain't there some-a cannon that can take you to the roof?" Waluigi asked.

"Oh yeah! I forgot-a about that-a!" Wario said as the two made a mad dash to see if the cannon was in the same spot as it always was. Which it was, luckily for them.

Waluigi quickly jumped in, and the cannon launched him onto the roof.

Then, Wario hopped in, but the cannon launched hard into the wall, and into the moat below.

"Ha! What-a loser!" Waluigi laughed as Wario constantly failed at getting to the roof. After about 20 more tries, he did get to the roof.

"Not-a one word..." Wario grumbled as he got up and started looking for a way to get in, before seeing a window on the center pillar in the back.

"Hey Waluigi, you know what time-a it is?"

"Eh, not really."

"ITS WARIO TIME!" Wario yelled out as he tried to break the window open, to no avail.

"Move-a aside Wario, because really, ITS WALUIGI TIME!" Waluigi yelled out as he kicked the window open.

"Because its always 'your time'..." Wario grumbled as he tried to get in, but due to his weight, it was pretty difficult, until Waluigi shoved him in.

"Finally-a! I'm WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Wario yelled as he fell down.

"Heh heh. Sucker. Now this will-a be easy as-WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Waluigi yelled as he fell down as well after getting in. He eventually landed on Wario, in the basement of the castle.

"Now comes-a the easy part-a, getting them coins!" Wario laughed out as the two began to search for the vault.

* * *

 **KNOCK KNOCK!**

Toad gasped. He for sure thought Wario and Waluigi had come back, but perhaps armed with bomb-bombs or other items. He grabbed his bat he would use for baseball, and carefully walked toward the doors, unlocked the extra protective locks and carefully opened the door, and quickly swung his bat at the person.

"Woah! Mama-mia!" The person cried out as he was knocked to the ground. Toad looked out and gasped to see that he had hit Mario.

"Mario! I'm so sorry! I had no idea it was you!" Toad said running up to him.

"Its-a okay Toad, I'm-a alright." Mario said as he got up, and Toad let him in.

"So what brings you to the castle today Mario?" Toad asked as the two walked along the castle halls.

"I was-a just coming to see-a the Princess." Mario replied.

"Oh, I think she was at some meeting today with some other kingdom, though she said she'd be back later." Toad said.

"That's-a alright, I can-a wait." Mario replied.

"Sorry again for hitting you, Wario and Waluigi tried to get in earlier, and I thought they had come back." Toad said, shivering.

"Those guys? Hmm..." Mario said, thinking.

"What's wrong?" Toad asked.

"Nothing. I just-a know that Luigi had called me today-a while he and Yoshi where heading to the Mushroom Golf Course, complaining-a that those two nearly ran him and Yoshi over." Mario replied.

"Huh! Strange!" Toad replied as the two continued to walk.

 **BOOM!**

An alarm began to go off.

"What's-a going on?" Mario asked confused.

"I don't know! Sounded like it came from the basement, we better check there!" Toad said as he and Mario ran down to the basement.

* * *

"Good-a thing we found that-a bomb-bomb, otherwise we woulda never gotten in!" Wario laughed as he and Waluigi finished loading all their bags with the coins from the castle vault.

"Now-a all we gotta do is get these-a bags to the car, get back home, and we'll-a be in the clear!" Waluigi said as the two began to start trudging their bags.

"I don't-a think you'll be getting-a away." Mario said as he and Toad came and approached the two.

"Wah! What-a are you doing here spaghetti boy?! Don't you have a Princess to save or something?" Wario said shocked.

"Not-a today!" Mario said proudly.

"Well you're-a too late this time Red Luigi! Because we're outta here-a!" Waluigi said as he and Wario attempted to make away with the coins.

Notice how it said attempted.

Why?

Probably due to the fact that the bags were filled up with so many coins, it was making it hard for Wario and Waluigi to make a quick getaway.

Mario and Toad looked at each other for a minute, before attacking Wario and Waluigi.

Mario wrestled with Wario, and Toad started attacking Waluigi with his baseball bat.

Eventually, Wario and Waluigi escaped their clutches, and made a mad dash back upstairs and to the main floor.

"What-a now?! They'll be up-a here before we-a know it!" Waluigi said.

"We'll-a just go out the front, and just head back home and think of-a another way to fix our money problem..." Wario grumbled as the two busted out the front doors of the castle.

Only to find themselves surrounded by the Mushroom Kingdom Police.

They were promptly hauled off into a paddy wagon.

"But we-a didn't do nuttin'! It was the spaghetti guy and the fungus fool!" Wario protested.

"Yeah! What he-a said!" Waluigi said in agreement.

"Yeah, yeah, the two explained the whole thing to us. I'm sure Judge Miyamoto will be very interested in your story." The Officer said as he ordered the paddy wagon to set off.

In the distance, Mario and Toad were watching the whole scene unfold.

"Mama mia, what-a day." Mario said sighing as he and Toad laughed about their accomplishment.

 **THE END**


End file.
